Idealistically, married couples would age gracefully together. Unfortunately, divorce can be a life-altering event that we hope never happens to us; until it does, however, its effects can be difficult to fully grasp. Here is some insight from men and women who have experienced it themselves: here are their insights into this life-changing event.
Divorce can feel like an impending death.
Even if it was your choice to separate, there can still be an overwhelming sense of loss when parting ways with someone you once shared. Not only are you saying goodbye to their companionship and family ties but you may be changing those too – be ready for this loss, as their relatives may support him/her regardless of any indiscretions or misconduct on either side.
Even if your relationship has come to an end, divorce will still be emotionally draining and challenging.
Experience has taught us that divorce can be very painful, even when prepared. When asking yourself “When is the right time and way for me to divorce?” and “Will the outcome justify my efforts”, please know these are not answers you will find overnight.
Your life and health depend upon being free from toxic relationships; by making the smart choice and filing for divorce, you are taking the right step to move on from them.
But the truth about divorce is that it remains difficult due to legal battles; going to court to settle or resolve some matters can be trying, while socially people may not know what to say when they see you. You should prepare for difficult times and emotional turmoil if seeking a divorce.
Friends may disappear.
Friends can be invaluable allies during a divorce process, yet one of the major complaints from divorced couples is that their married friends begin distancing themselves. Whether this is because of marital issues themselves or simply not wanting to take sides – it’s essential that new friendships be formed, with people who care and will support.
There is no glory in trying to make an unhappy marriage “work”, as divorcees know first-hand. Divorcee know there’s no shame in ending an unfulfilling union; when couples realize it is time to move on from it all there’s no point prolonging something which seems doomed from the outset.
Your decision could prove regrettable or at the very least make you question whether it was the correct one.
Even the harshest break-ups can become less painful with time. As your ex-partner moves forward with their life and finds love or remarries, jealousy or regret may arise for a brief time; you may focus on only remembering good memories while forgetting why your relationship dissolved altogether.
Divorces can quickly turn bitter.
Proceedings for divorces often follow an increasingly contentious path as disputes over child custody, assets and support become contentious. Even couples who initially seem amicable may be surprised to find themselves embroiled in bitter bickering that quickly becomes contentious. When disagreements surface about issues such as child support payments or financial support arrangements – a partner might become surprised that feelings of ill will and resentment surface during proceedings for their dissolution.
Divorce does not immediately lead to greater happiness
One reason people seek divorces is because they no longer find satisfaction within their marriage, yet going through with it does not result in greater happiness; divorce and happiness seem inextricable from each other.
Your life will become stronger and wiser as a result of divorce. No matter the outcome, you’ll have gained invaluable life lessons which you will take with you into new relationships.